Frowning Buddha

Date: August 20^th, 2008
Venue: Smiling Buddha Bar
Series: “What the Blunt” video release party

The gigging business is very much like dating – the minute you’ve gotten with the hottest girl in your area code, you’re not gonna want to go back to being seen in public with the less-than-average ones. We’ve played in the MuchMusic environment in front of hundreds of screaming fans wearing our shirts and waving signs, not to mention at least a dozen different cameras; one show later, we’re at the Smiling Buddha Bar pretending to care in front of at most a dozen different people.

Granted, at this point in our careers we shouldn’t be complaining about any kind of show, but let’s be honest – you can’t blame us. There are bands that grind away all their lives without ever getting the chance to perform at Much, and based on what I’ve seen, just about anyone with a pulse and a set of vocal cords can get on stage at the Smiling Buddha.

It’s not like we didn’t appreciate the show – au contraire, mon frère – any show is another stage we can work on our visual presentation with. Of course, it helps when there are actually people to visually present to, but at the end of the day, we make music for ourselves, because we love it – we don’t care if anyone is listening.

Okay, maybe we do a bit.

Unfortunately, it remains that the label reps told us on June 19^th at the Opera House that we need experience under our band belt. Apparently experience means that we’re on a stage in some obscure-ass venue playing to nobody (and the few who are in the audience are only there because you’ve put your friendship with them on the line over this measly gig) – rinse and repeat at least 50 times if you want attention, or even the worst kind of acknowledgement, from some measly label you’ll sign to and inevitably flop under. This is advice we’re slowly taking less seriously as the number of fans in the stands decrease per show that we play – after all, whatever happened to “quality, not quantity?” Whatever, if all else fails we’ve shown that we know how to take professional advice with utmost seriousness.

Let me just take this time to say that despite my grim, bitter depiction of the vicious cycle that local up-and-coming bands often find themselves in as they try to make a name for themselves, we truly appreciate each and every one of our die-hard fans that come out rain or shine, in health or in sickness, rocking homemade Soul Plane t-shirts and waving Bristol-board signs, travelling any distance from area codes I haven’t even heard of to hear us play live (no matter how epically we blow) in the most run-down, rape-friendly venues... this, my friends, is dedication. Believe me, we have nothing but love for you – I only wish there were more of you, or even some of you. Currently there’s one of you, and her name is Katherine. Get like her.

Anyway, this show was pretty much like every other show we put on over the summer, except that the rest of the acts were from the hip hop scene of Toronto rather than the rock/metal groups we usually get on the bill with. The evening was set up by John Shiltz, a rapper/promoter who put us on the list at a similar event last year, also at the Smiling Buddha. We went through our six-song set like the broken-record routine it has become, and all five people in the audience cheered. Despite that, I can’t help but feel that Soul Plane’s flight for the night never did manage to take off: for the first time in our performance history, we were not able to get our handful of fans off their asses and on their feet by the end of “Impossible.” I was appalled – I immediately lost hope for a surprise happy ending to our show.

I’d be lying if I said that our current re-structuring of each and every one of our songs according to the gospel of Greig Nori didn’t weigh us down; I’m sure it occurred to each and every one of us as we were playing the songs that each and every track in our repertoire (with the exception of the recently re-worked “Impossible”) dragged on for ages before coming to a close. By the fifth minute of “Liquor on the Curb” I was feeling the audience’s pain. It wasn’t so much that it all just kept going on and on though... it was more the fact that we were performing songs we consciously knew we’d have to discard or change up significantly – ie, we were trying to sound fresh playing music that was already stale and obsolete to us. This never helps.

Thankfully, this show closed off our summer tour of ’08. It could have been something we promoted heavily for instead of getting lazy and telling no one about it, but to be honest, we had accepted this (and every other show after August 9^th when we played at MuchMusic) as an anti-climax that we would have to surmount.

Oh well, at least we have getting on MuchMusic to look forward to...

On that note, please stop sending in emails asking about the air date of our episode... it’s not that this is classified information or anything... I just really don’t know what’s happening there just yet. We’re still in the midst of tying up loose ends, but please believe that the minute I know about it, so will you. It’s not like I don’t want you guys watching us, but trust me, I’m waiting on it like you all are.

Peace!

The Show Of Our Lives

Date: August 9^th, 2008
Series: “DISBAND” episode performance
Venue: MuchMusic

Today was Judgement Day. This show was to be the climax of our summer ever since we were given a spot on MuchMusic’s new upcoming reality series called “DISBAND,” to be aired late August/early September (see “MuchMusic (yes, THE MuchMusic)” blog – July 8^th, 2008). Today, we were going to be under fire from a panel of music industry professionals who were collectively going to determine if we had what it took to make it in this hairy business – based on our performance of a revised version of our lead single “Impossible,” these judges were either going to tell us straight up that we have what it takes to make it, or they were going to advise us not to quit our day jobs and to just disband (hence the name of show... clever, right? Wrong.) because we are absolute balls. All of this – performance and verdict – would be aired on MuchMusic, a Canada-wide, extensively-watched television network. This was about as much as Soul Plane has ever had at stake.

There we were, ready to unload at 10 30am outside the MuchMusic building. We weren’t going to be performing until 1pm, but I guess this was how long they needed to get us sounding good by then. We had everything planned out – right down to who was allowed to take a piss and when they were allowed to take it. We had done so much promoting for this performance it would make your head spin like a b-boy – I swear I have a tumour in my brain from all the calls I made to people I hadn’t spoken to for months and years, begging them to come out and make it look like Soul Plane had a fanbase rooting for us on national television cameras.

Even at soundcheck, the promotion for the show didn’t stop: outside on Queen St., I saw two gorgeous blonde girls coming to a stop together in front of the Much building, and one of them was taking a picture of the MuchMusic sign. I casually leaned over as she was steadying her hand and said, “You know, if you come back at noon the view will be much nicer.” She looked at me quizzically and asked what I meant. I told her Soul Plane would be performing live here at 1pm sharp, and that if her and her pretty friend went to go do some shopping and came back to line up by 12, I’d find a way to get them on MuchMusic as part of the studio audience. I explained most of the show’s premise to them and how Soul Plane got on it and they were unusually happy and excited for us, and promised earnestly that they would return after another hour or so of shopping on Queen. Their over-eagerness made me suspect something was up. They then told me they were from Halifax and that seeing a band play live at MuchMusic (something they only get to see on TV normally) was definitely an experience to look forward to. Suspicions confirmed – I knew it couldn’t have been me.

As noon started to creep up, I was getting reports from Conor and Shain (who were constantly making rounds in and out of the building) that our fans were still non-existent. Shit – I had told most of my friends to be there at around 11 30am in case there was a line-up, and now, almost 12pm, I saw neither friends nor line-ups. This was no good to me. Simply put, we could not afford to have a sparse backdrop; this would make us look unbelievably weak on national television. I started to worry – Mel had warned me that some of her friends bailed out on supporting our cause last-minute. Despite our 130-some-odd confirmations on Facebook, I had little faith that even 60% of the confirmed would show (as is usually the case for things of this nature). I even doubted the support of some of my own friends, not questioning their loyalty but knowing that things always come up, and that circumstances sometimes require urgent attention over a MuchMusic concert. As if this wasn’t enough, it was pouring rain outside – this is enough to make some people flat-out refuse to get out of bed.

Imagine my surprise when the gates finally opened around 1pm and the fans started filtering in through the back door. Throngs of people came oozing into the room in purple and white Soul Plane t-shirts. Apparently Harrison and Shain had been handing them out to everyone in line, along with copies of the demo. I swear Harrison is the best connection I’ve made since I started doing this music thing – he immediately sized up the situation and recognized the big picture – we needed our fans to wear these shirts for the cameras more than Harrison needed to make money off the manufacture of these shirts. So, in a gesture that can only be described as gallantly benevolent, he gave them out for free, out of his pocket, along with several copies of the demo (the manufacture of which he was also responsible for). Thanks, homie, we could never have come this far without you.

Fortunately, Harrison’s efforts and investments were not at all in vain – group after group after group of fans, friends, and family stumbled into the studio adorned in Soul Plane merchandise – the crowd size just kept getting larger by the second. The volume of the riff-raff and the chatter our fans were making became increasingly louder. Some of our most dedicated fans were holding signs with our band’s name and logo on them in huge, shiny lettering. People I had not expected to come through showed up – most notably, the two girls from Halifax were back wearing t-shirts and standing front and center, cheering like they invented it. In fact, I’m fairly certain you’ll be able to identify them when the episode airs, based solely on the amount of noise they were making. Pretty soon there were just over a hundred people (max capacity) packing themselves like sardines into MuchMusic’s environment. MuchMusic staff then had Soul Plane return to the green room so that they could bring the judges out.

These judges were supposed to be music industry professionals – we were filled in on them briefly: one would be an A&R/talent scout from EMI whose claim to fame was signing the band Billy Talent, another would be an established Canadian hip hop artist, a third would be a rep from a big booking agency, still another was going to be the lead singer of well-known Canadian band and the host of MuchMoreMusic, and lastly (but certainly not least), a MuchMusic VJ who had interviewed us once over the course of our month-long shoot with Much. These were some serious people, and we were about to either impress them or make them wish they had never showed up. We hoped to God it would be the former.

In the green room we were interviewed as a band regarding what we would do, how we would react, if we were told that we didn’t have what it takes, what we would do if we were ordered to disband. When the idea that Soul Plane would be featured on MuchMusic came around, we had decided as a band that no matter what the outcome of this performance, we would stick together and keep on making music together simply because we loved what we were doing. However, this wouldn’t stop us from wanting to get feedback as to why they came to their verdict about us, positive or not. It remains that we would still have liked to come away with a learning experience if they hate our guts – we would want to know what we could do to improve. We knew that if we were lacklustre, we were certainly not beyond redemption.

As we came out of the green room and back into the studio my spirits were immediately lifted by the amount of fans screaming and yelling at the top of their lungs in encouragement. Their thunderous roars almost didn’t sound cued. We got right on, picked up our respective instruments, and kicked right into gear. The next three minutes were euphoric – I spent most of it in a trance. There were cameras set up everywhere and the hardest part about the entire performance was deciding which camera to rap into. It was also weird having the loudest audience we’ve ever had... behind us. That’s right – let’s not forget we were play for the judges, all five of them, and for the first time ever, the fans were secondary. The judges were sitting in a row not smiling at us, more than likely waiting for us to flop big time. The only things in our peripherals when facing them were Queen St. behind them and like, 25 cameras all around them. Good thing we’ve had lots of practice playing to nobody.

At the end of our three-minute performance, our crowd exploded. Their cheering was absolutely deafening. We had been instructed by the Much camera crew to just drop our mics (instrumentalists were to un-plug) and walk off the set and back into the green room while the judges conferred and deliberated and formed their verdict on whether or not they thought we had what it takes to make it. As I walked off the environment towards the dressing rooms, I yelled, “WHEN I SAY SOUL...” and both times, the “PLANE” yelled by the audience in response came back at me like a punch in the mouth – I almost fell over the second time around. There was no question about it, our fans thought we had it. Judging based on the crowd reaction alone, Soul Plane definitely blew MuchMusic apart with the best and most solid rendition of “Impossible” we had ever brought to the table as a band, hands down, even by our standards.

But at this point, no one gives a shit about anyone else’s standards other than those of the five people that sat in a line before us. And just what did these music industry professional judges have to say about us? Well, you should’ve been there if you really want to know that badly, you unsupportive bastards. Now you’ll just have to wait until the episode airs, like everyone else across Canada.

Sucks to be you.

TO GET THE FULL VERDICT ON WHETHER OR NOT THE MUSIC INDUSTRY THINKS WE HAVE WHAT IT TAKES TO PENETRATE ONE OF ITS ORIFICES WITHOUT CONSENT, PLEASE TUNE IN TO MUCHMUSIC (yes, THE MuchMusic) END OF AUGUST/EARLY SEPTEMBER. AIR DATE TBA!

Boston Pizza Connection

Date: July 31^st, 2008
Venue: Boston Pizza
Series: n/a

When Luke first told me he had booked us a gig at the Boston Pizza he worked at, I gave him a funny look that could only be described as, “Well, how the hell is that going to work?” The event itself was supposed to celebrate the opening of a new location in Markham, at Major Mackenzie Dr. and Woodbine Ave., and Bud Light had been pulled in to sponsor the party. Luke originally had only needed Aaron to play drums for his jazz band, but probably realized that another show under Soul Plane’s increasingly heavy belt wouldn’t hurt.

After taking almost-unfair advantage of Luke’s employment status at Boston Pizza (we ordered one of everything on the appetizer menu and several pitchers of Bud Light, anticipating huge compensation), we were to go on and just do our thing. I tried to put myself in our soon-to-be audience’s shoes and wondered how I’d feel if someone was yelling rap lyrics in my face while I was trying to enjoy dinner. I’d fight me.

But the funny thing is no matter how big or small the crowd is, the people who are there for our shows always seem to enjoy themselves. This time around, however, it seemed that the customers were just as apprehensive as we were about our set – they seemed more intent on taking in their pasta than taking in our music. Furthermore, customers on the patio seemed to miss the jazz trio that had been playing for the last three hours, and I don’t blame them; they did a damn good job establishing an agreeable dining ambiance for everyone eating. And here came Soul Plane to ruin everything...

It wasn’t all bad, though. A table of affable Italian men toasted to us throughout our performance. I raised my (Bud-Light-provided) beer back to them on each occasion and told the loudest amongst them that he was a very handsome man. I referred to him as George Clooney for the remainder of the evening – he was drunk and happy. Also, my sister, who had never had the chance to come to my shows (she was out of the country for college and most of the summer), came with two of her friends to root for us. The two girls Bud Light had sent to help out for the event were very enthusiastic about our music as well, providing most of the yelling and screaming as they stood within arm’s reach of where we were performing. We truly appreciate the love.

We made chop suey out of the setlist. After each song, the clapping and cheering increased gradually in volume. Finally, by the last song of the set, everyone eating dinner on the Boston Pizza patio, along with pedestrians walking anywhere within audio vicinity of Woodbine Ave. And Major Mackenzie Dr. were vibing with us. Soul Plane was certainly something Markham had yet to get accustomed to. By the end of the night, one of the girls repping Bud Light asked for Conor’s contact card as she was telling us that she did a lot of promotion for clubs and venues all over the GTA. She refused to believe that as a band, we had been playing for less than three months under our current configuration.

I’m going to end this blog right here, because there are much bigger fish to fry at this point in our lives (see bold text below) – to sum the night up, it was a fun show and we rocked the joint like a Rastafarian.

Hopefully Luke still has a job.

EVERYONE NEEDS TO COME OUT TO THE MUCHMUSIC SHOW ON AUGUST 9^th, 2008. SEE “UPCOMING EVENTS” SECTION FOR DETAILS. BRING EVERYONE YOU KNOW AND GET ON TV CHEERING FOR SOUL PLANE!!